Conversation between coworkers in Atlanta

"I'm moving to Uzbekistan."

"Wow. That's random. Are you marrying somebody from there?"

"No."

"Do you have family there?"

"No."

"Friends?"

"No. But I know two guys who moved there."

"Are you in touch with them?"

"No. But I heard they moved there. They are very idealistic."

"Do you speak the language?"

"No."

"Did you get a job there?"

"No."

"Will you be able to earn a living?

"It's very difficult there to earn a decent living. And it's expensive too. A small apartment costs $800,000."

"Do you have $800,000? Are you wealthy?"

"No."

"Have you ever even been there?"

"For a few weeks."

"Did you like it there?"

"Not really."

"What about the people?"

"Can't stand them. They are the most obnoxious, crude, and selfish people on the planet. They're crazy and violent."

"They why are you moving there?"

"My friends all talk about it."

"Where do they live?"

"In New Jersey but they really want to go. And my guru told me it's where I belong."

"You're guru? Where does he live?"

"New Jersey."

"Why doesn't he move there?"

"He has to stay in New Jersey to guide people?"

"Why is he your guru?"

"My friends go to him. He teaches at the local university."

"I see. And what does he know about Uzbekistan if he doesn't live there?"

"I'm not allowed to ask questions like that. I have to obey him. He knows the holy books and it's impudent to question him. Oh, I forgot to mention. The country is very militaristic. They draft everyone into their army, young men and women, for three years of brutal training and deployment. They are perpetually at war, bombing nearly every country around them. And half the country is populated by a nation that lived there before them, and in the army I will be raiding their homes and dragging many of them off to prison. That includes children."

"Wait, don't you have children?"

"Yes."

"And you are taking them to this place that's at war all the time?"

"Yes, my guru told me to go."

"Why are they at war all the time?"

"It's because everyone hates us for no reason, just because of who we are. They want to destroy us. So we strike at them first. Anyway, I have to go home and finish packing. My flight leaves in three days."

"I'm curious, have you ever seen a psychiatrist? Maybe before you go, a short visit to a psychiatrist might something to consider."

"I know. It sounds crazy. That's why it's so idealistic."